Origin Stories: @ThoughtfulFetishist
- Southern Suitor
- Mar 7, 2024
- 2 min read

It must have started around age 4 or 5. I'm "primarily" a bondage fetishist and happened to be drawn to scenes in movies and TV when men in suits were bound and gagged. I put primarily in quotes because I feel like both fetishes started around the same time, but bondage has been easier to place in the kink/fetish category while suits and dress clothes kinks are usually hidden in plain sight.
I usually trace my clothing fetish back to being a child in a Christian household, who went to church every Sunday and would be pressured into dressing up for church. I've always felt like my mom's pressure to dress up for seemingly no reason at the time influenced me to put dress clothes and men in dress clothes on a pedestal of sorts. Specifically, my mom's reaction to my dressing up showed me that men in dress clothes = handsome and desirable, and that dress clothes was a key to getting attention, being attractive, getting respect, etc.
As a kid, this kind of attention terrified me, like the thought of being looked at and treated a particular way simply because of the clothes I put on my back made no sense to me. However, as an adult, I learned to love it, especially when paired with bondage. In any normative context that involves bondage, nobody necessarily dresses to be kidnapped. I don't even know what that would look like outside of a kinky context. But I adore the thought of a man being nicely dressed for a date, a job, an event, etc just to wind up bound, gagged, and objectified. The subversion of expectations, both in a literal turn of events, as well as the idea that a man's dolling up was appreciated for "the wrong reason" or "by the wrong person" really gets me.suits and ties when I was growing up.
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